Volume 1, Lesson 7

“Kibud Av va’Eim” part 3

Last week we discussed what to do when the honoring of our parents conflicts with our mitzvah observance.

STORY

My mother had a baby 4 days ago, smack in middle of finals. So I went kvetching to my friend. “I am so angry! What was my mother thinking when she decided to give birth during finals?! And now she expects me to help her?! No way!” My friend listened quietly and then said to me, “Do you ever think about what your mother does for you? Do you ever express hakoras hatov for all that she does?” I brushed her off. She is not in my situation she doesn’t know how it feels. But later it dawned on me. Wow! I never thought of it that way! My mother does so much. She is kind and loving and caring. I should really thank her.

Stretch of the Week

Call, write, or express through tefilla, the hakoras hatov you have towards your parents for anything they have done for you

Points to Ponder

Do parents owe their children anything?

Why are there distinctions between the honor accorded to the father and the mother?

Why do sons and daughters have varied obligations in this mitzvah?

HALACHA

“There are a number of distinctions between the obligations one has toward a father and those toward a mother, and between the obligations of a son and those of a daughter. There are specific halachos that apply to special parental situations, such as adoptive parents and stepparents. In-laws must also be honored to an extent, as well as an older brother and grandparents. There are no limits when it comes to observing the mitzvah of kibbud av va’eim, and fulfilling this mitzvah brings with it the promise of great reward in this world and the next.” Taken fromThe code of Jewish Conduct, Rabbi Yitzchak Silver PG 437.

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